Dirty Mag

Hopefully by now you’ve heard of the Fleshlight. A great milestone in male masturbation technology, the Fleshlight makes the mere hand damn-near obsolete. They’re famous not only for inventing a relatively discrete sex toy, but also for a line of toys in which they model their Fleshlights after the mouth, pussy, and ass of various porn stars such as Lupe Fuentes and Lisa Ann. More recently, they created a blue version modeled after (but in no way technically related to) the Na’vi from Avatar. And now they’ve released an awesome new line of toys for the Halloween season called Fleshlight Freaks. Not only does this line include unique molds of Fleshlight toys, but also a dildo, depending on one’s preferences. [...]

You’ve probably seen the term underboob being thrown around on blogs and other sites in the past few years, and the term is really as simple as it sounds. Underboob refers to photos in which a woman’s breasts are mostly covered, but the underside is still visible, as in the photos above. Essentially, it’s “upside down cleavage“. It’s hard to say just why so many guys find it hot, but I’d imagine it has to do with the teasing and mystery aspect of it all; it portrays a woman who’s still technically clothed, but who could be willing to show it all off or who could just be a cocktease. Either way, underboob is really sexy, and it’s a way for more prudish celebs to flash some tit without going fully topless, and for seasoned stars like Tera Patrick to mix things up a bit. And, hey, some tit is better than no tit, right?

Ladies, this one is for you! And well, for a few of the guys out there too. Today’s wonderful fetish fix is yaoi, a phenomenon that first became popular in Japan and is now beloved all over the world.

Yaoi, also known as “boys love,” is a  Japanese term used to describe books, manga (Japanese comics), films and more directed at women that focus on homoerotic or homoromantic male relationships. That simply means that it’s naughty stories full of nothing but guy on guy action. You may have stumbled across it before – pretty anime boys kissing each other or pics of the Harry Potter boys fucking. Yeah, that’s yaoi. While it is made for women and most popular with the ladies, there are also male yaoi fans out there too.

So to sum it up yaoi can be used to describe an assortment of things that feature men kissing, fucking or whatever naughty thing you can think of. To get a better idea of what it is I dare you to google search “yaoi” or “jacob edward yaoi” or any other famous characters, just add yaoi at the end and you’ll get something raunchy.

I should add that yaoi isn’t always graphic and dirty, something it’s just romantic.

If you thought Oscar the Grouch was the character most likely to turn to adult entertainment, you were wrong, –apparently, Elmo, what with his crazy tickling fetish, was the first to turn to the dark side. Or Elmer, sorry. The fact that he went there with Katy Perry isn’t that surprising. Katy Perry, Snoop, Lady Gaga, and Rihanna are some of the parody cast members. I have to say, I think lady gaga probably would have been fine about being in the film, if they asked her. I doubt she’d have any qualms about having sex with a Sesame Street puppet. And don’t forget a spoofed Russell Brand appearance! The wig is rather similar to Brand’s actual hairstyle, –as accurate as his overly inarticulate accent. You can watch the hilarious trailer here. I hope you’ll like Katy Pervy as much as I did.

Today’s fetish fix is all about raptophilia. With this paraphilia the sexuoerotic arousal and orgasm depends on the surprise attack and continued violent assault on a a non-consenting, terrified, and struggling person. Yes, it’s rape. But in a raptophiliac’s case, they want it and are turned on by someone (a biastophiliac) attacking them and taking them without permission. If your significant other has ever asked to do rape role-playing, there’s a slight chance they are a raptophiliac.

In rare, and serious, cases an unhealthy raptophiliac will purposely put themselves in incredibly dangerous situations in the hopes of being attacked and sexually assaulted.  This is no joke, such a person could easily be killed.

So while role-playing is all good a fun, if it grows into something seriously dangerous, seek help.

That’s right guys, the most annoying fag hag on the planet TwitPic’d a topless shot, and –it was shortly deleted, either by her, or TwitPic. Thank god we managed to capture the absurdity of this woman’s withered and floppy boobs before it was permanently wiped off the face of the Internet. Sorry, I just do -not- find this woman attractive. Or funny. I’d rather buy a ticket for Celine Dion than get into a Kathy Griffin show for free. Barf. But for all you sickos who have wanted to see Griffin’s tits, –here they are…. pitiful, flat things that seem to be giving sad, hound dog eyes at whomever they meet.

I’m not so sure, but others are claiming that the Vibram Five Fingers ad in this month’s Men’s Health magazine is the sexiest ad ever. Vibram Five Fingers are those weird shoes with separate spots for your toes, like gloves, but in shoe form. It’s mostly the super outdoorsy folks and nerdlings that love these shoes, but it looks like Vibram is trying to appeal to a much larger group of buyers by turning up the sex appeal in this new ad, which features and man and woman wearing nothing but body paint and these shoes. Personally, I didn’t even notice the shoes, just the model’s sexy bods. So, they caught my attention, but just the dirty part of it.

Now, while the ad is fucking hot, I can’t say that it’s the sexiest I have ever seen. What do you guys think?

There are so many incest fetishes out there, and an infinite number of roleplay scenarios that go from popular, to perverse, to insanely criminal. And yet, it’s one of the most popular perversities around. I moonlight as a phonesex operator, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked to pretend to be a mommy, a daughter, a big sister, etc., and honestly, I’ll admit it gets pretty old. But the scenarios keep changing. Occasionally, a story pops up in a newspaper, in which two consenting adults have formed an incestuous relationship; there are discussion and counsel/support groups online that cater to those who are in a consenting incestuous relationship.

Not sure how I feel about consensual incestuous relationships, though the incest taboo is one of the most ancient sexual taboos of all time. It’s existed for thousands of years, in many cultures, and even animals tend to avoid breeding with their own kind, for the most part. Animals only breed with immediate siblings/ancestors/descendants when there’s nothing else available, particularly in the domesticated settings. Consensual incestuous relationships are heavily politically debated, while in the meantime, incestuous marriages are illegal, unless there is no blood relationship, or if the relatives are very distant from each others’ family tree branches.

Sexually abuse should maintain in its position of illegality, –but should we make it legal for consenting adults to marry, even if they’re an incestuous couple? Or leave it as a private choice, –if a still mostly illegal lifestyle choice. As the word was introduced to the English language in the year 1225, –chances are, it existed before that, –so with it being such an old practice, the chances are, it’s here to stay. Do you sympathize with those who are berated, lynched, attacked, and accused of being sick?

Gorgeous horror babes, and scream queens:

Akasha, as portrayed by Aaliyah (RIP) – Aaliyah, gorgeous, with a perfect body, and not to mention, the tragic character now that she’s dead, made the perfect vampire queen. In Queen of the Damned, she was sexy, romantic, deadly, vicious, –a perfect vampire. Her exotic looks totally transcended the genre; she was the black widow of contemporary scream queens.

Paris Hilton – Sure, I know what you’re thinking, –ditzy blonde airhead, –but those are practically prerequisites on the application for scream queen. Her death in House of Wax was priceless, –for one thing, because it was damn creative, and because she managed to survive for a pretty long while. Then, her antics in Repo: The Genetic Opera, –her face-off scene, amazing, plus, she was hot… and she sang!

Jenna Jameson – Just for her role in Zombie Strippers. I know, I could have picked a billion different babes, with way more acting credit, but –she fucking Jenna Jameson. She’s a Jenna Jameson zombie stripper! She’s hot and dead! If you’re a gore-met and a perverted fan of her porn, this is like the Holy Grail of Horror.

Chronophilia refers to a fetish in which one is sexually aroused by the idea of age discrepancy between the sexual partners – young women being turned on by old men, older women being aroused by younger men…etc.

It actually has ties with multiple paraphilias (graeophilia, teleiophilia…etc.) and has to do with the person’s sexuoerotic age being discordant with his or her actual chronological age and is concordant with the age of the partner. Meaning that the person with this disorder is identifying with someone who is either much older or much younger than himself or herself and thus mimicking the other.

Chronophilia could be used to describe something minor like 40-year-old cougars being attracted to 20-year-old men, to something far more serious and horrible  like pedophiles.