Dirty Mag

Valentine’s Day is a day for flowers, chocolates, love, and all that mushy stuff, but even if you’re in a committed relationship you know damn well that you sneak peeks at sexy girls whenever you think you can get away with it. It’s just natural, really. With superhotties Ashley Tisdale and Sarah Hyland posing together for some video or photoshoot, you’ll sneak a peek even if it means your wife will slap you upside your lecherous head. Posing in bikinis is sexy enough, but these two also slip into some skimpy shorts, knee-high socks, and roller skates for a bit of extra fetishy hotness. Each has something to offer, too, with Ashley Tisdale flaunting her perfect ass while “innocently” eating ice cream. Sarah Hyland, however, flaunts her little, faux jailbait body, knowing how much men lust over her teenaged character on Modern Family. Putting the two of these girls together is almost unfair!

I have the flu, so maybe some of you poor bastards are suffering from it too, this time of year. Science hasn’t given us a cure for the flu or cold, and brilliant scientist Jenny McCarthy urges us to shun vaccinations, so I’ve just gotta suffer. However, science has done many other good things, such as allowing women to increase their cup size through the magic of surgery and silicone. So, yeah, this post is for you fake tit lovers to help you feel a bit of relief from whatever ails you. The first pics are of one of my favorite celebrities, Victoria Beckham. While she tragically had her implants removed or downsized a couple years or so ago, Posh practically dripped with sex appeal when she had them. There was no way not to look at them; those glorious and obviously-fake breasts quite simply demanded attention, much like Victoria Beckham herself. For a couple of my other top silicone-enhanced celebrities, check out the rest of this post after the jump!
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Maria Menounos recently lost a bet, having banked on her team, the New England Patriots. As you hopefully know by now, the Patriots lost, and it was glorious, if only because she had to host her show in Times Square wearing a Giants-colored bikini. Ok, glorious would be if she had to strip down nude, or offer herself up to the entire Giants team, or something else equally kinky. In fact, the bikini incident was pretty lame, however she did head to the beach in a different bikini for a far sexier set of photos. The Greek-American hottie donned a tiny blue bikini which showed considerably more, particularly due to the sight of her hard nipples poking through the thin top. The slender Maria Menounos has a fantastic pair of breasts which are outlined almost perfectly, and there’s even a nice ass shot as her bikini bottoms slip down!

Mayra Suarez is a 25 year old model from Mexico who I’d never heard of until today. A simple Google search brings up a ton of pictures of this beautiful brunette, however, most of which have her modeling lingerie and underwear. Nice, but nothing compared to these photos of her which were leaked onto the net. The self-shot pictures were most likely meant for a boyfriend’s eyes only, with her sliding a hand beneath her panties, flashing her perfect breasts, and even going fully nude to reveal her shaved pussy. How they made their way across the Internet, I don’t care, but these are pics that are meant to be shared so those that have only been able to ogle her in lingerie can now enjoy every bit of her hot Latina body. It’s truly amazing how far we’ve come in the last ten years with regards to the availability of nude photos of actresses, models, singers, and other celebs!

With features like Sinful Sunday and Titty Tuesday, Coco Austin’s Twitter is more popular than ever. She doesn’t actually do much other than go clubbing and show off her body, but you know by now that there are countless of celebrities who do even less than that. What Coco does have going for her, at least, is a ridiculous body. I can only imagine that her huge tits and enormous ass are implants, mostly because my brain can’t comprehend a body like that being created by nature. No, this is the work of science. Her body was expertly crafted by an elite team of scientists, designed out of pure sex. Because, honestly, I don’t think it’s possible to look at this woman and think of anything other than the wild ride that her curvy body could give you. And if you were somehow immune to that reflexive action, you’re thinking about it now. Don’t deny it.

There are many celebrities that I’d like to finally see nude, or even just see nude again. Keira Knightley‘s definitely near the top of that list, so I’m pleased to share these high quality images from A Dangerous Method. Keira Knightley shows plenty of topless hotness in these pics, including some sex scenes. Sure, she may not have the largest, most glorious tits in the business, but when it comes to petite actresses, there are few that can top Keira. Not to mention that the prim and proper attitude she seems to give off just makes it all the sexier when she bares her body on camera for millions of pervy guys around the world. There really isn’t much more incredible than this petite goddess bent over doggystyle, making an O-face with her perky little tits hanging out of her dress.

Some of you may have heard of Kristen Bell‘s new TV series House of Lies. Or, more likely, you heard Don Cheadle prattling on about how everyone would be getting naked on the Showtime series. That Judas. Going by the current state of the show, it’s not looking as if we’re going to see the lovely Kristen Bell naked anytime soon, which is probably the reason a good portion of viewers started watching in the first place. On the other hand, we did at least get to see her in her underwear in a recent episode, which I have to say is worthy of posting. The blonde cutie shows off her awesome body and round ass, but I still wish she’d go “Full Showtime” and bare more, if not all! Firefly‘s Morena Baccarin did so for HBO’s Homeland, so the ball’s in your court, Kristen.

I really should feel guilty for posting about Tila Tequila and all the other attention whores I’ve blogged about, but when it comes down to it, these are the ones all too eager to show off their tits to the world. And, really, any woman with a hot body who’s willing to let the world enjoy it deserves at least some recognition. So yes, that’s why I’m posting about Tila Tequila, the crazy Asian cutie who’s known pretty much just for her shitty TV show and her amazing fake tits. And since this post isn’t about her show, you can be damned sure it’s about her tits! While out rollerblading (for some staged photos) she “accidentally” (read: not accidentally) let her tit fall out of her bra (because lingerie is standard workout attire). Reading into it isn’t important, just enjoy the fact that she has a tight little body capped with two silicone wonders, which should be on display as much as possible.

Originally, I’d planned on posting about Miley Cyrus‘ tits in a see-through top (and I did include one image of that, because why wouldn’t I?). However, I was immediately distracted when I discovered these images taken at a birthday party, which appear to show Miley Cyrus worshiping a big black cock and balls with her tongue. Tragically, this turned out to be a birthday cake designed to look like a big black cock and balls, dashing my hopes of Miley Cyrus having turned to interracial porn to make a buck. Of course, there’s still plenty of time for this fantasy to become a reality, so I guess I should at least be happy that she’s getting some practice at it. Now if I could just get Victoria Beckham on the right track to starring in a bukkake film, I might just win that Nobel Prize I’ve been coveting.

The world may be growing tired of Lindsay Lohan‘s bullshit, but I don’t think they’ve yet tired of Lindsay Lohan’s big glorious tits. I mean, that’s pretty much the only reason the cameras follow her around anymore, since it’s not as if she’s truly starred in any movies lately. However, because of those cameras, we get these see-through shots of the Lohan’s big boobies, hard nipples and all. The freckly redhead blonde owes us these more candid shots after her terrible, Photoshopped Playboy pictorial, after all. In fact, I might just call it even if she came to my house and treated me to a topless lapdance. I’m a fair and just man, if nothing else. If the judges won’t make her do the hard time she deserves, I can think of much more productive ways she could make it up to society.